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Ex-erotica writer hired at Houston Chronicle?

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So maybe it’s just me, but I always love reading the “Style” section of the Sunday paper where they tell me how much I should spend on things. (Like $148 for a simple hat or $12,800 for a watch…both of which were featured in their what to buy for Father’s Day section.)

But the best part was when they suggested buying a scent diffuser for the man in your life. Cause every guy loooooves getting a little vase with sticks that smell good poking out of it. The suggestion isn’t as funny as the write-up, though:

“Let this diffuser scent your man cave…”

Ummmm, wait. What? “Scent your man cave?” Why does that just sound obscene? I have to say, I’ve never wanted my husband’s “man cave” scented. Ewwwwww.

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The new magic from witches – the watches!

Mickey Mouse watch
Mickey Mouse! Mickey Mouse! by gracey @morgueFile

Seriously.  Watches aren’t new.  Nor are they hard to find.  But, according to this past Sunday’s “Style” in the Houston Chronicle (12/15/13), it looks like watches are now trending.  I suppose people are tired of carrying around those annoying sun dials everywhere they go.  According to the piece by Sarah Rufea, the first wristwatch came out in 1868.  So…not new.  Apparently they are extremely rare and hard to come by, though.  Why do I think that?  Well, if you read this article, it appears that the cheapest watch you can find is just over $200.  Seriously.

Rufea goes over the glory of rose gold on a watch.  The two watches listed are in two price ranges – expensive and holy shit I think I just bought a watch instead of paying for a college education!  The first one is mere $695 – hey, it’s only a Burberry, though.  The second one is a Chopard L.U.C. at a whopping $38,500.  Yeah, that’s right.  Almost $40,000.  For a watch.

That’s okay, though, if you don’t like rose gold, there’s the “Americana” style.  You can go with Shinola (which immediately brings another word to mind) for a measly $550, or you can pick a slightly more stylish Tag Heuer for only $6,300.  (Ironically, these are the Americana style…shouldn’t they be the ones made in China?)

But that’s okay, because if you thought those were reasonable, it’s time to look at the “big faces.”  Now, I’m totally into watches.  And years and years and years ago, my father used to get me some cool watches from Chinatown.  Those “big face” watches were popular when I was barely a teenager.  And I think he probably paid about $10 each.  Now, though, they’re popular again.  And in order to hit that style, you’re looking at a bit more than $10.  In fact, the cheap one that Rufea lists is a steal at $16,000 from Bulgari.  And if that isn’t enough to make it worth your while, then you can go ahead and make the choice between a new car and a watch and go for the $25,150 Rolex.

Now we get to the really cheap ones.  If you like bright colors, you also must be a tightwad because that’s where you can find a Kate Spade watch for a barely mentionable $225 or a Dior for $5,800.  Obviously, those into bright colors don’t have the spending cash of those who like Americana or big faces.

Here’s my thing – I love watches.  I collect them.  And I don’t think I’ve ever spent that much on a watch.  I admit, I love Swatch.  Still.  Always.  Cheap plastic, yeah, but why didn’t they make it into the bright colors?  Why didn’t they include them?  Oh, because they aren’t “stylish.”  And because they’re affordable. 

Yeah, yeah, I know I’m a grumpy crazy old woman, but I just love reading the Style guide from the Houston Chronicle purely for the ire it gets going.  I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything in it that was meant for your average person.  (Either that or my idea of “average” and their idea of “average” are waaaaay differnet.)