Blaming the victim part deux…

Just another scary, scary example of what’s wrong with the world…

At the bottom of the article, detailing a woman being kidnapped at gunpoint, driven somewhere and raped, someone in the comments says, “come on lady, why didn’t you fight back?? Makes you wonder……

Really?  Really?  It makes you wonder why someone didn’t change getting shot in the face?  Cause, I dunno about you, it makes me wonder what is wrong with our society that this even happens.

I also wonder how the poster would respond if someone was ever kind enough to point a gun in his face.  Would he keep wondering?  Or would be just piss himself?



Feminist Rant Number #139

I don’t really have time to be blogging right now, but there are just a few things that have popped up lately that have my ire going enough that it can’t wait…

First, in today’s news on CNN, we have confirmation that Cain may have actually done something wrong.  Is it because a woman came forward and reported it?  Nope, we’ve gone back to “good ole days” standards: it’s because the boyfriend of the victim reported it.

Yeah, I wish I was kidding, but there’s the headline – “Former boyfriend of Cain accuser backs her account.”  Wow, thanks, ex-boyfriend!  Now we can believe her!

And if that was the only thing in recent days to get me going, I probably wouldn’t be writing this now, but sadly, there’s more…

In today’s news in Sweden (going a bit afield, but hey…), a high school principal was kind enough to tell one of his female students “Guys do this kind of thing, you have to get used to it.” when she got up her nerve to tell him she’d been raped.  He discouraged her from going forward to the police because – “this is not a prioritized case as no serious crime has been committed.”


And it only gets better (worse?)…

In Turkey, just over a week ago, 26 men who had been convicted of having sex with a 13 year old girl were told it was okay because it was “consensual.”  We can ignore the fact that they were paying money to two adults for “repeated access to the girl” for just over six months.  Personally, though, my favorite part of the article is when it mentions that “any rape or sexual assault [that] happened with the consent of the girl or the woman, then the sentence would be reduced.”  Ummm, consent? Rape?  Aren’t these kind of contradictory terms?

But, hey, at least we have the right idea here in America.  Don’t we? Nah, I guess we don’t.  Because, according to an “excellent” (read: heavy sarcasm) article on CNN again, we should “make a rule on sexual harassment.”

The highlights that CNN is kind enough to pull out on the side, according to expert Barbara Risman, “society hasn’t reached consensus on what’s OK in the workplace.”  Cause, you know, we don’t have any rules in place that are based on a consensus of what shouldn’t be done.  In fact, in her brilliance, she suggests rules that make it “illegal for bosses to make sexual overtures to subordinates.”

Don’t we already have those rules? And that consensus?  I could swear there’s this who thing…what’s it called? Oh, yeah, the US Equal Employment Opportunity Commission…  They talk all about laws and regulations and prohibited practices…so are those “rules”?

Maybe we can’t fix problems in other countries (unless you talk to the Republicans), but we sure should be able to fix them here.


Heinlein was right!

Okay, so everyone who knows me knows of my habituation. (And thank you to the League City Police Officer who was kind enough to explain to our small group the difference between an addiction and a habituation – we are not “addicted” to coffee. We are simply habituated to it!) So here I am at a Starbucks in a part of town I don’t normally hang out in, but I have a job interview in about an hour, and I needed a quick coffee and some lunch.

First, I knew the area wasn’t really my comfort zone when I saw the stores surrounding the Starbucks. It’s like the Galleria vomited out all their top sellers. If you walk in with anything less than three credit cards, you will be lucky to be able to afford a pack of gum. A slight exaggeration, maybe, but I’m not joking all too much. We’re definitely talking about stores that a mere adjunct can’t afford to shop in. Not even their sales racks.

The baristas here all drive luxury cars. At least, I assume that from the fact that my convertible is the cheapest car in the lot. From my window seat, I can see the line of VWs, Lexi, and BMWs. Another PT Cruiser might show up at night. You know, when the cleaning crew is here.

So what does all description of the 1% have to do with Heinlein? You may be asking yourself that question, and I won’t keep you in suspense any longer…

The bathroom was filthy. Seriously, these people have never learned how to use toilets before from the amount of piss all over the seat. And the floor was covered with used paper towels that had just never managed to make it into the garbage can (which was a nice covered one with plenty of room left).

Now, if you don’t know Heinlein, maybe you aren’t making the connection. But he had a lovely little bit once about how you could tell a lot about a society about how they treated their public bathrooms. If they had any respect and caring for their fellow man (or woman), the bathrooms would be clean and well maintained.

I think it’s pretty clear that the 1% using the bathroom here sure don’t care about their fellow women…either that, or they’re just too used to having a maid dogging their footsteps and cleaning them up.

Worst Starbucks bathroom ever.

The 1% should be ashamed of themselves for that alone.


Found Myself

“But today I found myself. Right where I left me, up on that shelf. Right where I left me. Right where I put me.” (Vermillion Lies)

Last December really threw me off. And while it’s hard for me to believe it’s taken me a year to get to this point, here I am now.

I’ve started roller skating again, and I’m planning on becoming a boot camper with roller derby by the beginning of next year. While I haven’t quit the full-time job search, I’m pickier about what I apply to now, and I really care what job I wind up with. I’m not going to take something just for the money – I’ve discovered that I can budget and work well enough with just adjunct work. And, probably the most important change – I’ve dropped my Education PhD program and I’m working on applications to MFA programs for writing.

That’s a massive change.

It really started brewing a few months ago. I wasn’t happy with Capella for a number of reasons, and when a problem arose, their handling of the situation made me feel as if I was definitely a number in their budget as opposed to an actual student. Coupled with the realization that I really had no urge to finish my degree, it was a killer. Yes, I wanted those letters after my name, but did I really want to be an expert in Education? Was that really my life goal?

My life goals, which sadly (or perhaps not so sadly) have not changed since I was little, were to teach, to write, and to have a son. Well, I’ve achieved those. And getting a PhD in education was not going to help with those. But getting a Phd or MFA in Writing…well, that was something!

So I withdrew from my program at Capella, but with bunches of hours and a Post Master’s Certificate in Education (College Teaching). Something to show for my two years, at least.

And now I can go and focus on what I want to do, and I can stop worrying about what I *need* and instead look at what I *want*. Cause really, in the end, isn’t that the point?